Narcissists often try to win back their exes with ‘hoovering;’ experts say it’s emotional blackmail. – USA TODAY

• It’s common for toxic exes to reappear into our lives and ask for another shot at a relationship.
• It’s possible to change abusive tendencies, but experts in narcissism warn they may be lying to you.
• “Hoovering” is the dating trend of sucking someone back into an unhealthy relationship through manipulation.

“If you take me back, I promise I’ll change.”

Often times, toxic exes will try to re-enter our lives under the guise of change: They’ll say they’ve grown into a more loving partner and even offer up tempting gifts. But do they mean it?

Though some couples can reconcile in a healthy way, experts warn about a common tactic used by narcissistic and abusive partners: “hoovering.” Named after avacuum, it involves sucking someone back into a toxic or emotionally abusive relationship through manipulation and lies.