Sex and relationship expert Nadia Bokody opened up about “post-nut clarity” and why men ghost women after sex.
The sexpert explained that after sleeping with her girlfriend, Nadia was worried that she’d write her off as “a frivolous night of fun”.
This was based off her experience of dating men who don’t text back and cut you off after doing the deed.
Nadia said: “Relationship experts tout the ‘make him wait for intimacy’ tagline for good reason.
“Talk show host Steve Harvey even coined a more extreme version – the infamous ‘90-day rule’ – in his best-selling book, “Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man”, which instructs women to make the guy they’re seeing wait 90 days for sex to improve their chances of securing commitment.
“The reality is most women who’ve found themselves swept up in the heat of the moment have waited for a text the next day that’s never come.”
And, Nadia added that her friends have even said she slept with people too fast and didn’t make him “earn” it which would “hurt their ego” and mean they didn’t call anymore.
She noted that men admitted to her that they often see getting a woman into bed as a challenge – and when they’ve managed it they’re over the relationship.
Nadia labels this as a form of sexual coercion.
She told news.com.au: “Men go silent after sex because we teach them to view it as transactional, and don’t raise boys to have the same kind of expressive communication as girls.
“While scoffing, “Boys don’t cry!” and “REAL men are tough and strong”, what we ultimately do, is perform a kind of emotional castration on boys.
“It’s little wonder the term ‘post nut clarity’ has taken off in recent years.
“Defined by Urban Dictionary as ‘the immediate clear mindedness or soberness an individual gains after orgasming,’ it’s a non-scientifically proven condition which largely exists to excuse away men’s poor post-coital behaviour.”
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She added that sometimes women do ghost men after sex but that this is usually because they fear retaliation or they’ve already made it clear that they’re not interested in more than sex.
Nadia wrote: “Though we like to treat sex as something that’s distinctly different for each gender, the truth is, we’re far more alike than we care to admit.
“It’s the culture we raise young men and women in that causes us to behave differently when it comes to sexual intimacy.”
You can follow Nadia on YouTube for more content.