The tortuous process of finding a name for your band

In 2007, a couple of listeners asked me if I would do another Ongoing History of New Music program on the origins of band names. I’d done a few in the past, but I was happy to accommodate.

This time, however, I was struck with a question: What do you call the study of the names musical groups choose? In the decades since the birth of rock ‘n’ roll, someone must have come up with a term.

As it turns out, no. The study of word origins is etymology. If you’re looking at place names — known as toponyms — then you’re into toponomy, toponymics or toponomastics. We get a little closer with the word for the study of personal names, which is onomastics or anthroponymy — unless you’re just concerned with surnames, which is patronymics. But, much to my surprise, there was no official term for “how did a band get their name?”

This struck me as a massive oversight in the field of linguistics, so I called up a few academics, who then roped in other language experts, including a branding and marketing guy in California who had coined the terms Swiffer and Blackberry. They returned with a suggestion: bandomynology.

Since then, I’ve been on a mission to see that the word spreads into the common vernacular so that one day, it’ll end up in the Oxford English Dictionary. Disappointingly, the OED people still haven’t called despite my best efforts, including a column in this space in 2021. The Urban Dictionary, however, has been most kind by adding bandomynology to its list of searchable words.

It’s again time to put the word out there with a little more bandomynology.

Big Wreck: They were known as Still Waters until they had a really bad rehearsal one day, something that one of the members categorized as a “big wreck.”

Blink-182: The most common story is that the group was originally named Blink, but was forced to change it when they were informed that there was already an Irish band by that name.

Why the 182? Unclear. Stories speculating on its origins include the number of times Tony Montana drops the F-bomb in Scarface; the number of the ship that bassist Mark Hoppus’ grandfather served on during the Second World War, and the number Mark believes his ideal weight should be (in pounds, of course). The most intriguing is that it’s code for a rival high school from guitarist Tom DeLonge’s school days. The “18” stands for the letter “R” (the 18th letter of the alphabet) and the “2” is for “B” (the second), short for Rancho Bernardo High. This means, according to Tom, that the correct pronunciation of the band’s name is “Blink Eighteen-Two.”

The Dead Milkmen: First, don’t judge — the name choice is a lot more literary than you might think. There’s a character in a Toni Morrison novel called Milkman Dead.

Garbage: An insult that backfired. When Butch Vig, Duke Erikson, Steve Marker and Shirley Manson were demoing material for their debut alum in 1993, a “friend” commented that the material “sounded like garbage.” That turned out to be perfect because the band was looking for something irreverent.

Hoobastank: No one is really certain, although legend says it may have come from a mispronounced German word or just a joke name from high school.

King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard: This was a compromise. Someone wanted to call this Australian group Gizzard Gizzard, but someone else wanted to honour Jim Morrison, who had the nickname, “The Lizard King.” So, King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard met everyone in the middle.

Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark: Easy. They were looking for the most pretentious name possible. It’s certainly better than their original choice: Hitler’s Underpants.

Paracoccidiodomicosisproctitissarcomucosis: A real metal band from Mexico specializing in a particular type of grindcore. This is a combination of various diseases and medical terms.

Pigs Pigs Pigs Pigs Pigs Pigs Pigs: The English band was originally just Pigs, but they kept adding Pigs as they strived to be obnoxious. Pigs x 7 is an acceptable substitute.

Portugal. The Man: This is convoluted. It’s the mix of two concepts: A country of many people (like a band), and an individual (a specific person). The period designates the “many” from the “one.”

Rage Against the Machine: The phrase comes from the title of a song by Inside Out, a pre-Rage band fronted by Zack de la Rocha. Since RATM appeared in 1992, conventional wisdom says that the “machine” they’re raging against is soulless corporations pursuing profit at the expense of humanity. Given Rage’s political stance, that makes sense.

However, it may refer to the group’s persnickety 1979 Chevy van. Zack: “I can’t tell you how many times that van broke down in 1991 when we were starting out and how many gigs we lost because it would quit working. When we finally had enough money to buy a new van to house our equipment, the first thing we all did was take sledgehammers and beat the crap out of the thing.” A stretch? Maybe. Still, it does fit.

The The: When Matt Johnson formed the band in the late ’70s, “The” bands were fashionable (The Clash, The Cars, The Ramones, etc.) He simply decided to take the trend to its logical extreme. At one point, The The was practically impossible to Google as the search engine used to ignore definite articles in any search query.

Wet Leg: Rhian Teasdale and Hester Chamber found the name by combining random emojis on a keyboard.

XAVLEGBMAOFFFASSSSITIMIWOAMNDUTROABCWAPWAEIIPPOHFFFX: No, really. This “gore grind” band released a debut album in 2016. I can also tell you that this is an acronym that stands for … well, be careful before you click here. You can listen to their work on Spotify, starting with the hit song, Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilivolcanpconosis.

And finally, !!!: This Sacramento band was inspired by the lead actor in the 1980 movie, The Gods Must Be Crazy, which followed an Indigenous man on his travels through Southern Africa. He spoke the Jul’hoan language, which uses a series of clicks. In written form, that click is represented in English by an exclamation mark. If you want to say the name out loud, the band prefers “Chk Chk Chk.”

See? Isn’t bandomynology fun?

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